Amazing Shabbat. Went with a friend, stayed by family, great food, wonderful company, caught up with old friends. One guy I saw Friday night and just couldn't get him out of my head. He is so hot and beautiful, cute and sweet. Just perfect. When he said something about putting on weight since coming to Israel, getting a beer belly (it was clear he had no such thing), I wanted to say, "I saw you when you came and you were damn sexy then and you are fucking hot now!" I just had to see him again. Next night instead of returning home, I went back to see him and spent the night. We went out and played pool (my first time) and then chilled, he cleaned up his room, and we listened to Dave Chappelle. I loved every minute. When I'm with you, everything is perfect. Please don't take this the wrong way. I care about you so much. You inspire me. Now, if only you could know. But of course, there is that old "don't want to mess with a good friendship by making it sexual" thing. And the whole awkwardness of coming out and all, of course.
When he was in his boxers and sitting on his bed and I sat on the bed across from him and got an "upskirt" view of his parts when he shifted in his boxers it was like a lick of Carvel. And I love ice cream. They were beautiful. And I'm usually not a fan of men's privates. Gay or not, I'll be kissing and cuddling and a guy will start taking off his pants, and I'm like whoa Johnny, hold it right there boy. And when I do deal with cock, I'm not one of those "I like big dick and and I cannot lie" type of people. I like 'em pretty. But when I'm really in love with a person and worship him from head to toe, well, those parts are just that many more inches of him to love. Sof kol sof, he has a real nice package.
I had a dream that I got married. I was thinking maybe if I got married we would sleep I Love Lucy style on our own beds because lovemaking is fun when you are awake, but I see no reason why I should have to give up on ever getting a good night's sleep without elbows in my face or my dick in funny places just because I'm married. I'm all for cuddling and stuff. I enjoy that as much as anyone, but there is a time for everything and while I'm sleeping, I prefer you to let me sleep. In peace.
Anyway, back to the dream. So those thoughts (above) may have provoked the dream. My new wife is sleeping on the couch and I approach her and ask why doesn't she come to bed. She is unused to the whole concept of being a wife or even being with a man because she grew up in a haredi home where she never even spoke to boys. So I want to be good to my wife and speak gently and caringly, trying to be there without being pushy. She says she isn't feeling well. After ensuring she is well, I tell her that it would make me happy if she would come up to bed, but she should do whatever she feels is best. I don't remember the name she had but it sounded like Lola or Lila, probably based on the opening paragraph of Nabokov's Lolita.
"But Lola," I said, "can we make a date for tomorrow?" And I must have seen this scene in some movie, she replied, "A date? But Teddy. . . we're married!"
"I know, Lo sweetheart, but I just don't get to see you enough."
"You're right Teddy, with both of us working. . ."
The nice thing about dreams is that they are entertaining like watching a movie, but you get to sleep while you are watching them, you get to direct the action yourself, and when there is a sex scene, you are in it! Dreams are God's gift to mankind.
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