Suicide is painless, it brings on many changes

Disregard the title. Suicide has nothing to do with this post. It's just a cool lyric from a fun song (which I admit to having set on repeat when feeling down).

Had a week off from work for the Jewish holiday of Sukkot. Got some rest. Did some networking. Became an honorary ivy league alumnus, scoring contacts worth a lot more than the donation that earned me the status. Watched the movie version of Chicago.

Continued an SMS dialog with P, wherein I ask to meet and he says he has to work. And I always question myself whether he appears disinterested, but so far my conclusion remains that he would like to hang out but truly is busy.

Once again had to ditch M for a random cutie I just met. I felt bad, but what should I do? M could have had me but seemed to want a pretty unconventional (read: sexless) relationship. So I interpreted that type of relationship as "friendship", which is not normally meant to be exclusive...

Another night I had a whole bunch of guys all over me, but couldn't pick one and left without any. That's the classic "always looking for something better" syndrome.

Was once again told to get a car. Thing is, I still believe it would come in handy, even be a lifesaver, a couple times a month but be a total drag the rest of the time.

I thought I was off for Columbus day. Found out last minute that I'm not. I wouldn't have minded coming in, except it was annoying working the logistics after finding out so late. Anyway, it's good to be back. I feel better when making money. I think that's what I'll tell the next guy who asks why I'm not drinking: "Actually, I'd rather just have the money..."

Weekend Trip, Cute Story, Search Wars

My parents were going away for the weekend, and I had a choice: Go with them or stay home and have the house to myself. For the first time in a good while, I decided to go with them. So I didn't get laid this weekend, (though there was some eye candy tanning by the pool, and another cute boy working at the pizza shop). But it was a nice weekend. Good to spend some time with the family. Relaxing atmosphere.

I got a ride back with a family I didn't know. They were determined to avoid traffic at all costs. So they avoided NYS Route 17 and drove through Pennsylvania, taking something like U.S Route 209 to U.S. Route 206 to NJ Route 15, etc. It seemed absurd, but if they had done it right Google says it should only add about 3 miles and 25 minutes. If it avoided potentially hours of traffic on the 17 it could have been a smart move. However, all that fails to account for the difficulty of driving on dark, winding, country roads in the fog and heavy rain, making wrong turns and generally not knowing where you're going. In the end, the trip took a "respectable" four hours or

---

Crazy question: Why is West Milford, PA east of Milford, PA?

---

My grandfather told a cute story, a "chassidishe ma'aseh": There was a Rebbe (Grand Rabbi) who had a custom to toss apples into the crowd of his followers who would gather at the close of the Festival of Tabernacles. The men would eagerly grab for the apples, as there was a tradition that anyone who catches one would be assured a year of wealth. Over the years, the crowd grew and men would fight and push to get the blessed apples. The Rebbe's assistants warned their master that the situation was becoming out of control and with all the shoving, people might get hurt. The Rebbe sent a message to the people, "There should be no more pushing to catch the apples."

The next year, the pushing was even worse. Now, as each man shoved his neighbor out of the way, he would taunt him, "Have you not heard the words of the Holy Rebbe? He said not to push, and still you push for the apples!" The Rebbe's assistants returned to him with the news. The Rebbe responded by issuing a stern warning, "Whoever pushes to catch the apples will be cursed with five years of poverty."

The next year, there was no pushing. The crowd was smaller than usual, and everyone who came stood rigid, afraid to push for fear of the Rebbe's curse. As the Rebbe began tossing the apples, however, one frail elderly man ran frantically through the crowd grabbing as many apples as he could. After the event, people came over to the old man, incredulous. "Is it not foolish to risk five years of poverty for the chance of a single year of wealth?" they asked.

"Ah, but where else can I receive the Holy Rebbe's guarantee that I'll live out the next five years!" responded the old man, a twinkle in his eye and a smile on his lips.

---

In other news, Microsoft's much-touted Bing search engine, well, sucks. Just as a random example: I was searching for information about the world's largest green-energy project, DESERTEC. So I typed Desrtec [sic] into Bing (actually into the Firefox search box, which happened to be set to Bing at the time). What I got was this page asking if I perhaps meant to search for Bachelorette News or maybe Shooting in Pittsburgh or Vanessa Hudgens Nude. Google's first result was Desertec.org. Even spelled correctly, Bing gave the $500 Billion pan-European consortium's plan one link, and then listed results for "Deserted".

Personal Details

I had a good trip to Atlantic City. I borrowed a car and just drove, without a clear destination in mind. I stopped in a couple of places on the way, at a random campgrounds, some Jersey Shore beaches (Long Beach Island, Asbury Park). Eventually I ended up in AC. I gave myself a walking tour of the place including casinos, bars, beaches, and shops. Then I met a cute guy and some friends of his who invited me over to their hotel. I didn't play any slots or do any gambling. But I did go to the casino with one of the guys and watch him play out $20. The whole slots thing seemed so silly, but it was fun to spend some time together. Watching him enjoy the experience made it special.

This week was J's 20th birthday. Lots of people were away for the summer, but we had a little window-fogging celebration in the back seat, for what it's worth. I didn't actually mean for it to happen that way. We were just hanging out, and then I offered him a ride, and then, yeah.

I'm trying to figure out what, if anything, to do for my birthday - coming up soon.

So I took a vacation and what and why

So I got in the car and drove. Traffic. Traffic. Then it cleared up a little. Stopped off, did some shopping. Drove. Traffic. Music. Finally got there. Stripped and jumped in the pool. Ahhh. Then opened the house, warmed up, relaxed. Cooked dinner. I made a simple meal, fried some burgers, had some leftover roast, pesto sauce with toasted whole wheat pitas, chopped liver. Somehow it was one of the best meals I've ever eaten. Then I flipped through some channels on TV. There was nothing on. And if there was, I flipped that channel during a commercial break. Seriously, I don't know how people watch broadcast TV. So I popped in a DVD and watched Sunset Boulevard, or Rocky. (I watched both over the weekend, just don't remember which one fits into this point in the story.) And it was all so amazing, I had such a good time.

After the movie, I went out on the porch, and took a giant lungful of sweet country air; it was after midnight and everything was silent. I looked up at the starry sky and looked all around, the trees, the lawn. Beauty everywhere. And then I cried a little because I was all alone, there was no one to share this great night with. But then I cheered up, that's a small thing to kill the mood over. I went out and sat on the swings, climbed on the monkey bars, and jogged a little. Then went to sleep ever so peacefully.

When I awoke, I made a pot of steaming cocoa. Read Frank O'Hara's Ave Maria and Edna St. Vincent Millay's What Lips My Lips Have Kissed, And Where, And Why. Reread Prufrock, and Ginsburg's America. Then swam a few laps, came in and made breakfast. I found nothing on the telly, so I went for a walk. Made popcorn and watched another movie. Got out the basket ball and shot some hoops. Took a long bath, so relaxing I half fell asleep in the tub.

The only thing missing was the people, but to paraphrase Sartre, people are hell anyway. I got back to the city just in time to be fashionably late to the ball. Okay, well more late than was fashionable to be honest. But I heard they ran out of food early on and had to order more. The organizer called the caterer frantic, "Send me anything you've got, we're on empty here!" So I must have gotten there right after the food was replenished, which was cool because I hadn't eaten much all day. I made the rounds of hellos and how are yous and good to see yous and congratulationses and thanks yous and then dug in.

This Is A Tweet

Back at work, and it's like I never left - except for the 2 week backlog of work. Yikes.

Now Ur a Man

Omg I can't believe this video. I said I wouldn't discuss the specifics of what we did on the weekend. This video doesn't show what happened or what it was like, but I think anyone who was there, with a little sense of humor, might appreciate this video. It brings out a little of the ideas. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Vl7jBY-owE&feature=email I don't know if that link will work, I'll fix it later. You can just search YouTube for "dvda man song" or some such.

Disclaimer: I'm not making fun of people named Maynard. Your name might be Maynard and it might not. What I mean to say is, don't get offended, lighten up, and yes I still do take it seriously.

Speaking of YouTube, when I first heard of YouTube (this is going back a number of years) I thought it would be spelled utube or utoob or even you2b. That was how they named everything in those dotcom days. But they actually spelled it out. Whodathunk

In other random news, this spell checker doesn't respect caps. So when I misspell a word that started with a cap and then click the right spelling, it replaces the word with an all lower version and I have to fix the cap. If you're reading this, Firefox people, here's a project for you.

Oh as for all that talk of plans, well, I woke up late. Missed the museum trip (which actually ended up being a NY Auto Show trip), missed the golf, but I caught the guys after the game and we chilled so that was good. I'm not much into golf anyway. I texted a buncha folks. Did call the LA guy in Florida, plan to meet up when he gets back. Went to the gym (did I mention my disappointment when I went on Sunday and found them closed for Easter? I think I did), but it was a short weak workout. My ipod battery dying in the middle didn't help any. Still, something is better than nothing, and it'll hopefully keep me conditioned enough to do a better workout tomorrow.

Oh, remember J from that circuit party? He finally answered me on socialnetworkplace. His boyfriend was hurt and sad about the whole thing, anyway too much drugs make you crazy (kids, just say no! Actually, I'm not one to talk. I said no to drugs, and look where it's gotten me ;) But the good news is he still wants to stay friends. Yay! Lol I'd basically given up even hearing from him anymore.

My menu has gone from whole wheat bread, eggs, tuna fish, bran cereal with milk, etc. to matzo, tongue, crumb cake, stuffed cabbage, nuts, and coconut macaroons. It's a little ridiculous.

I've been playing with a new toy all night. The Archos 5 media player. 160GB for roughly the price of a 16GB iPod Touch. The Archos is bigger (plus for larger screen, minus for added bulk), nice responsive touch screen

I decided I want to direct movies. Add that to the list after acting and singing and drawing. Actually, put it before those. But after writing.

Is it just me, or does more happen when I'm on vacation? Jai Ho!